Hate is such a strong word....

I HATE WORK.

I HATE STUPID PEOPLE.

I HATE BEING IN CHARGE AND TREATED LIKE CRAP.

I HATE LONG LINES.

I HATE PEOPLE WHO NEED AN EXPLANATION FOR EVERYTHING.

I HATE DUMB CO-WORKERS.

I HATE USING MY LUNCH BREAK TO DO NORMAL DAY TO DAY ERRANDS.

I HATE PEOPLE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF ME.

I HATE BEING GULLABLE.

I HATE THAT I CAN DISH IT, BUT CAN'T TAKE IT.

I HATE HOW RICH PEOPLE THINK THEY'RE MORE IMPORTANT.

I HATE WORKING THE DRIVE THRU.

I HATE WAITING.

I HATE STUPID OLD MEN JOKES.

I HATE WHEN I ASK PEOPLE HOW THEY'D LIKE THEIR CASH AND THEY SAY "SPENDABLE" OR "GREEN". JUST ANSWER MY DAMN QUESTION.

I HATE BEING TIRED.

I HATE WHEN PEOPLE DONT KNOW THEIR ACCOUNT NUMBERS.

I HATE WHEN CUSTOMER DONT FILL OUT THEIR OWN DEPOSIT SLIPS.

I HATE WHEN CUSTOMERS SMELL LIKE THEY'VE BEEN SLEEPING IN THE GARBAGE.

I HATE GETTING TO WORK WHEN THE SUN ISNT OUT YET, AND GETTING OUT OF WORK AFTER THE SUN SETS.

I HATE, HATE, HATE....

After Christmas Blues...

So I can't remember even one year that I was in the Christmas mood. Sure I've been excited to see my family, have us all together... but I've never been a Christmas kinda girl. This year was no exception.

It's my boyfriend and I's first Christmas together... and we spent it apart. So that wasn't fun. But both my brothers and their fiance/wife were coming plus the cute little niece Elissa! So while they were here, I was preoccupied with spending time with them... cherishing the little time we had together. I love my brothers. Whit- no matter what he says, I laugh. He's amazing at telling stories, so animated and his impersonations are hilarious. I love him. Cigi- for the most part he's a self starter. He sees something or someone that needs help and he does what he can. I came home from work and he was cleaning the backyard in the dark. He was taking out the trash, and he was helping me with my secret project. I love him. I love my sister in law Jasmine. Even though we rarely talk, she's one of my best friends. I can tell her anything and know that I won't recieve judgement in return. Marlene- I cannot wait to officially be sisters with her. Not only is she one of the most "REAL" girls I've ever met, but she has always been uplifting and supportive. No matter what. And oh my gosh they are both so gorgeous!!

My dad played Santa for us all on Christmas Eve. It was pretty hilarious. The first set of "ho ho ho"s when he came in the door were perfect then after that he sounded like a Santa who was about to keel over and die. He was weezing and gosh... it was hilarious. Whit was copying "Santa" all night after that. :) We sat down for our Christmas Eve family dinner and the cutest thing ever - Elissa looked at her plate of salad and said "where's brocolli??" So adorable that all we could do is start looking for brocolli. And ofcourse the rest of the time together was filled with "where's the brocolli?" She's a good eater. Elissa is my little best friend. She loves so freely and unconditionally. She accepts everyone and her smile just makes me melt. Tuesday night when I got home from work she came up and asked "where's Michael?" and I automatically teared up. My whole family asked how he was, where he was, if he got home to Chicago safely. It meant so much that my family accepts him in our family. He's become my life. And by them including him it sort of feels like they are accepting all of me. I don't know if that makes sense to anyone else... but it meant a lot anyhow.

A storm was about to come through, so Cigi, Jasmine, and Elissa got on the road early Christmas afternoon... Without the little one, the house was bare, silent... I hated it. Then we checked the weather and it was getting snowy and bad down south so Whit and Marlene got on the road as well. Then it hit. I was alone. The fun and loud noise in the house, gone. I had yesterday (Friday) off from work expecting to still have family in town... and I just spent the day in my jammies and in my room all day. Thank goodness I had work today even if only for 4.5 hours... atleast it gave me a reason to get outta bed... I love my family so much. I can't wait for next Friday to drive down to LA and see my family again. Love and Miss you all.

-Shivey

Thank Heavens for an iPhone at work...

Boring Day At Work....

So today is Thursday. And I'm pretty sure the only thing that's exciting about today was that I was able to see how much my paycheck will be tomorrow. Nothing really going on... So I decided I would document my boring day at work. So here it is...



I get to work this morning at 9am. There were a few cars in the parking lot, most of them waiting to use the atm. When I walked inside- there was one customer in the whole branch. His name is Danny, and he's a chef at a local restaurant. Very nice guy...



So I get my cash drawer out of the vault and log onto the drive thru computer. It's freezing here at the drive thru, so ofcourse I plug-in the old rickety space heater. While I'm unthawing, I stood at the drive thru for a good.... oh I dont know... 20 minutes before I had my first transaction of the day.




So I was standing here bored out of my mind, then I decided to play with my phone and take random pictures of myself... then ofcourse I decided to go take pictures with and of co-workers... And if you know me, it ofcourse escalated to "ohhh.... go outside and take a picture of me at the drive thru"... etc.

So anyways, I put up the photos so you all can laugh at how boring a day of working at WaMu is. :) Love you all!!!!

Lies, lies, lies....

I've never been one to lie. I hate lying. I have the hardest time with myself afterwards... and as hard as I try to justify it to myself... it's just not right.

I lied twice yesterday...

I hate when I feel like I HAVE to lie... Like I can't get through the situation without lying. The pressure to lie in this world is just crazy. And the people that are honest by nature are rare indeed...

Long time no.... Blog?

So WaMu is no longer... Where does this leave Little Shivey? Between the hours of 8:45am - 6:15pm I'm lost. Where am I? What does this mean for me? The past 2 and a half years I've lived for WaMu. I've worked hard to learn policies, remember customers, build rapport, make new friends/business contacts, etc. I've tried so hard to be the best "WaMulian". And last Thursday night I learned that all we gave to this company wasn't good enough. I hadn't been good enough... or at least that's how I felt.

The company was sold to JP Morgan Chase Bank. And now comes the thoughts:
-"How long will I have my job?"
-"Where should I look for a job?"
-"What will happen to all of my fellow WaMulians?"

Hey.... if you have an open position.... let me know.

Feeling Lost

The love of my life lives an hour and 45 minutes away. We've been doing all we can to cope with that fact. He leaves from work every Friday afternoon and drives to St George, gets there about 20-30 minutes after I get home from work. And then we enjoy Saturday and Sunday - 2 amazing full days together. And I drive down to vegas when I have a day off during the week.

This has been our routine, our life...

I feel like the last 3 months of travelling back and forth, only seeing my lovey for 2 maybe 3 days a week... it's caught up to me. I constantly miss him. It's ridiculous! It's like... how did I get through my days without him before? I'm just going to put an effort into having a great time with my friends and family, and just enjoy our time together.

Love you all.

~Morning Routine Epiphanies~

My time in the morning- in the shower, blow drying my hair, etc... that's my time to think over things in my life. This morning I had so many thoughts running through my head...

Last night Michael and I were talking future talk... He's looking into being a police officer. And with his military background, there's no trouble getting into that field. We were looking at certain cities Police Departments... checking the salary, benefits, etc. We even looked at apartments in the areas to see price ranges...

There was one thought or feeling that stuck with me since we started looking online last night, was going through my thoughts this morning, and still with me now- I just hope this isn't the whole "yeah we should do this!" and it never happens. Don't get me wrong... I'm not saying that Michael doesn't follow through- I just want the next part of our lives -the part that we start together- to be now. I'm sick of the waiting... the wanting...

I want my life with Michael to start.

Twisted Principles...

Ever since I was a child my parents taught me certain principles... certain beliefs...

It's so hard now as an adult realising that the principles/beliefs you were taught as a child were somewhat skewed... Bare with me, my thoughts are so jumbled I'm trying so hard to piece things out. Maybe skewed is the wrong word. The way I was raised was great, it has made me who I am. And who I am now has an amazing and loving boyfriend, great friends, ...great life. But with the way I was raised, I feel that if I were to ever go against those principles/beliefs... that I would be an automatic disappointment. A let down. Because with the principles/beliefs I was raised to believe... that's the only way, it's the right way.

Hmm... I'm just so torn.

Nothing a little alcohol can't take care of....

I just thought that title would be hilarious...



Today is full of emotions, but mainly I'm just tired. And if you know me, you'd understand that if I'm tired... all the other emotions come out in full effect.



So yeah... Maybe I should get some sleep?